They say that everyone has a story inside of them. This is not always a good thing.
I’ve talked about the issues of toxic writers’ groups before. In particular, I’ve talked about group cultures that won’t help you improve your writing. Now, I want to talk about particularly toxic writers you might encounter in these sorts of groups.
The first issue that you might run into is when the toxic individual happens to be running the group. When that happens, the only real solution is to leave the group, and potentially start your own by taking as many people as you can with you. I wish I had better advice than that, but that’s really the only solution I’ve found. If you have a toxic group leader, they might just kick you out of the group anyway. Toxic leaders tend to turn a group into one where everyone is too afraid to give any actual feedback.
The next problem you’re going to run into is the hostile critic. The hostile critic is the person who berates you for your writing, doesn’t provide any feedback you can use to improve it, and in some of the worse cases attacks your writing for not including things in previous chapters that he wasn’t in attendance to hear. For example, you might have two chapters that have fight scenes, and then have a slower chapter where your audience gets to catch up. If the hostile critic wasn’t in the group meetings for the last two chapters, and the only chapter he hears of your action story is the catch-up chapter, he might throw a tantrum because your story doesn’t have enough action in it. If you or anyone else tries to explain to the hostile critic that he simply missed those parts, he’ll just ignore you and keep yelling.
The key to a hostile critic is that they’re a bit like a child throwing a temper tantrum to get attention, and the only solution is to deal with them the exact same way: ignore them. Don’t argue with their criticism, don’t try to reason with them. Just don’t give them the attention that they want.
Now, if you’re reading this and wondering “am I the toxic critic?” If you’re asking this, then you probably aren’t, but if you’re worried that the feedback you’re giving people is too harsh, there’s one simple rule you should follow with all of your criticism: as long as you make certain to take the time to provide suggestions on what the author can do instead of whatever it is you didn’t like, your criticism isn’t “hostile.” Because that’s the definition of constructive criticism: suggesting things that the author could do instead of what they’ve already done.
The second type of toxic writer is, essentially, the opposite of the toxic critic: the defensive writer. The defensive writer is the person who freaks out whenever anyone criticizes their writing. Unsurprisingly, the toxic critic and the defensive writer can regularly be found in the same person, and the way to deal with them is roughly the same. In this case, just don’t bother critiquing their writing. Hand them back a manuscript with your initials and no other feedback, if you feel brave enough.
The third type of toxic writer is, of course, the Karen. We all know the Karen. The Karen is the person who complains to the leader of the group and demands that you be removed because you said something she didn’t like. The Karen is the person who wants you barred from the group because you wrote something she didn’t like. The Karen wants you to know you did something she didn’t like.
Okay, let’s be blunt. There are so many types of behaviors that fall under the idea of “a Karen” that we could literally refer to every other toxic writer type as some variety of Karen. For the sake of clarity, we’re not going to do that, but recognize that any entitled behavior could qualify as acting like a “Karen.”
One variety of toxic Karen is the kind who tries to get you to change the genders of all your characters and character arcs. Do you have a public domain character in your work that has always historically been both male and an all-around good guy? “Could you make him a woman?” Got a female character who has flaws? Any flaws at all? “Could this be male?”
This type of Karen generally wants all the character traits she thinks are positive to be embodied by demographics she likes, and all of the traits she thinks are negative to be exclusive to the demographics she doesn’t like. And yes, this does mean she wants to see an endless production line of Mary Sues.
You can try explaining to a Karen that every protagonist needs flaws in order to have a character arc, or that you aren’t going to deliberately upset an entire culture by redesigning their historical gods and heroes that once belonged to their ancestors for no reason other than “but my feelings!” The Karen might listen. She probably won’t, though, and if that happens, your best option is to just put your foot down and say “no.” There’s not a lot she can do about it. She might turn into a ball of rage and try to threaten you, but Karens are not used to facing resistance. A firm stance and a refusal to be bullied is usually enough to make them fold.
Another type of toxic Karen you may encounter is the kind that complains to the group leader behind your back. These are the ones who are most likely to involve the saying “perception is reality.” Refer to my article on that topic for details on how to deal with this kind of Karen.
Going away from Karens into a more general type of toxic writer again, we have the spiteful writer. The spiteful writer is someone who is using their writing as an outlet for the toxicity in their own life, and criticizing it is virtually pointless. This is different from the defensive writer; the spiteful writer won’t make a stink about someone critiquing their work, and they won’t react to constructive feedback. Because that isn’t the point of their writing, and it never was.
And finally, we have the violent critic. This is not the same as the hostile critic. The violent critic doesn’t just berate you; they threaten you with physical violence and may even try to make good on those threats. This can either be a particularly large man, or another variety of Karen who carries a cooler with a bag of ice to use as a weapon to every group meeting. Boy that’s a specific example. I wonder where I came up with that one?
The best way to deal with the violent critic is to be bigger than they are. Okay, obviously that’s not an option for everyone, so if you aren’t very big, take some self-defense courses, or get your boyfriend to come with you to group meetings, or apply for a concealed carry license. The good news is that bags of ice are not very effective weapons, even if she tries to strike the back of your head from behind.
I’ve been trying to improve my video-making skills lately, and hopefully will have some better audio in my next video. I also regret to inform you that Amazon is changing their prices, and soon the cost of my books will be going up. I don’t know how much yet.
